Aspectstuck
by r.fLowers
Summary: I switched the beta and alpha kids with the trolls in their respective god tier aspects. The new kids play Sburb, but I focus more on the relationships between everyone. The chapters are mostly short because I switch characters with every chapter. Please review! It's my first fanfic :3 Rated M for language
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1:**

**Aradia: Wake up.**

You wake up to the sound of someone pestering you on Pesterchum. You knew you should have closed your laptop before going to bed, but you were so tired last night, you definitely weren't thinking straight.

You decide to answer the sorry chum who woke you up. Oh, it's your friend Tavros. On second thought, maybe you should just ignore him and go to bed. He probably just wants to rant about some stupid romcom he watched last night and how Matthew McChonoughey (or however the hell you spell it) took off his shirt. Not even in an ironic way.

Your taste in things has developed in a fucking awesome way, you think, because of your bro's (mostly) wonderfully ironic influence. But the sight of smuppets still haunt from that one event… You know, let's forget about that. You might as well answer Tavros.

- eternalTutelage [ET] began pestering turntourAllkeeper [TA] -

ET: dID YOU GET IT YET?  
ET: dID YOU? dID YOU?  
ET: oH,,, sORRY, YOU MUST BE ASLEEP  
TA: w0w y0ure a fucking psychic  
ET: dID i WAKE YOU  
ET: i'M SORRY IF i DID  
TA: its fine i guess  
TA: i mean im up n0w what can you d0  
ET: uHH  
TA: s0 what did y0u want  
ET: dID YOU GET IT YET  
TA: what  
ET: uHH,,, tHE GAME OF COURSE  
TA: y0u mean the 0ne y0u just l0st  
ET: aWW MAN,,, FUCK, THANKS A LOT  
TA: my pleasure as always  
ET: wHAT i REALLY MEANT WAS SBURB  
ET: dID YOU GET SBURB  
TA: h0w the hell sh0uld i kn0w i just g0t up  
ET: wELL YOU SHOULD GO CHECK THEN BECAUSE THIS GAME LOOKS REALLY AWESOME  
ET: aND i, uHH,,, wANT TO PLAY WITH YOU AS SOON AS WE CAN  
ET: iF THAT'S FINE WITH YOU  
TA: yeah whatever  
ET: cOOL  
ET: rEALLY COOL  
ET: :)  
TA: I d0nt even have the game yet s0 d0nt get t00 excited  
ET: yEAH i KNOW  
ET: iT'S JUST THAT  
ET: uHH,,, i'VE BEEN WAITING SO LONG FOR THIS GAME TO COME OUT AND i FINALLY HAVE IT  
ET: i'M SO CLOSE TO ACTUALLY PLAYING IT  
TA: d0 0nly guys get this excited 0ver a vide0 game release  
ET: iT'S ACTUALLY A COMPUTER GAME  
ET: aND, uHH,,, i DONT KNOW  
ET: i'VE NEVER REALLY MET ANY GIRL GAMERS  
TA: maybe y0u w0uld if y0u left y0ur r00m 0nce in a while  
ET: uHH  
TA: but even then y0u w0uld have a hard time finding s0me  
TA: girl gamers arent in abundance  
ET: uHH,,, iNTERESTING,,,  
ET: i GUESS i'LL GO NOW  
ET: sOMEONE ELSE IS PESTERING ME  
TA: 0h is it y0ur tr0ll girlfriend  
ET: sHE'S NOT MY GIRLFRIEND  
TA: 0f c0urse  
TA: I believe y0u in the fullest

- eternalTutelage [ET] ceased pestering turntourAllkeeper [TA] -

**Aradia: Check the mailbox for Sburb.**

You make your way down to the first floor of the apartment complex to look for the stupid game. You would rather rub your face in the plush rump of your bro's smuppets than play this fucking STUPID game. You always knew Tavros was a gaming nerd, but you have no idea what makes him want to play this game so much. It just sounds like another version of The Sims or something. Why would anyone want to play a knock off of The Sims when they can just play The Sims?

Anyway, you've successfully reached the first floor of the apartment while avoiding any traps bro has set for you. You uneventfully open the mailbox, which predictably has a Sburb disc inside. Wait. It says 'Disc 2.' Oh fuck.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2:**

**Tavros: Answer troll girlfriend.**

You cannot answer your troll girlfriend because you DO NOT HAVE a troll girlfriend, like you said before. But this does not change the fact that the troll girl -no, woman- that has pestered you would make a great girlfriend. If only trolls had the same kinds of relationships as humans. That would make interspecies relations much easier.

Oh wait, someone else is pestering you. Oh shit, it's Vriska.

- tactileGlobetrotter [TG] began pestering eternalTutelage [ET] –

TG: Heeeeeeeey mohawk 8oy.  
TG: I heard you got THE GAME.  
ET: yEAH,,, sO?  
TG: I have it, t8. Aren't we going to play together?  
ET: yEAH BUT  
ET: uHH,,, wE HAVE TO WAIT UNTIL THE OTHER TWO HAVE IT  
TG: 8ut why?  
TG: Where do the rules say that?  
ET: iT'S JUST THAT  
ET: oUR SESSION WONT WORK VERY WELL WITH ONLY TWO PEOPLE  
TG: Um, okaaaaaaaay...  
TG: I guess I 8etter get out of your hair then.  
TG: I'll leave you to talk with your troll girlfriend.

- tactileGlobetrotter [TG] ceased pestering eternalTutelage [ET] –

ET: bUT HOW DID YOU KNOW SHE PESTERED ME?  
ET: uGH,,, wHATEVER,,,,,

**Tavros: Finally pester your troll girlfriend.**

How many times do you have to say it? It's like everyone just wants to rub in that you've never had a girlfriend in all of your 13 years alive. You take a deep breath and FINALLY answer the troll of your dreams.

- gladdenedGucci [GG] began pestering eternalTutelage [ET] –-

GG: hey tav! I see you finally have sburb! :)  
ET: hEH HEH YEAH,,, i'M SO EXCITED ABOUT IT :)  
GG: its good to hear that you have such a great attitude about it!  
ET: yEAH IT'S GREAT :)  
GG: i dont want to ruin your excitement or anything  
GG: but i just want to warn you it may be tough to get a successful ending  
ET: rEALLY? hOW COME?  
GG: well the game challenges your physical and mental abilities  
GG: its very easy to get killed! :O  
ET: dON'T WE GET EXTRA LIVES THOUGH?  
GG: well i guess technically you do but thats only if the highest level is reached before death  
GG: and you have to die on a special bed  
GG: arg! im saying too much!  
ET: wHY CAN'T YOU SAY ANY MORE ABOUT IT? aRE THERE RULES ABOUT SAYING TOO MUCH ABOUT YOUR OWN SESSION?  
GG: yes and no :/  
GG: there are things i can get away with saying but if i say too much ill turn your timeline into a doomed one and probably everyone will die  
ET: wOAH,,,  
GG: yeah! i know!  
ET: wELL THEN PLEASE DON'T GIVE ANYTHING AWAY  
ET: i LIKE LIVING,,, hEH HEH :)  
GG: ill try not too! X)  
ET: hEY, jADE?  
GG: yes?  
ET: dO YOU THINK WE'LL EVER  
ET: uHH,,, mEET IN PERSON?  
ET: oR TROLL OR WHATEVER  
ET: uGH,,, tHIS IS COMING OUT WRONG  
GG: its possible but im not sure  
GG: ive seen some of your session inside the game, and with the way you play, i dont know  
GG: anything can happen!  
ET: iM CURIOUS NOW HEH HEH :)  
GG: well id like to tell you what i know, but remember that whole doomed timeline thing?  
GG: well i got to go! talk to you later! :)  
ET: bYE jADE  
GG: bye!

- gladdenedGucci [GG] ceased pestering eternalTutelage [ET] –-

**Tavros: Sigh deeply.**

You sigh deeply and think about what Jade would look like when you see her for the first time. You wonder what trolls even look like. Sometimes you wonder if these 'trolls' are actually aliens or just humans playing a stupid trick on you. That _is_ the definition of troll.

You suddenly realize that you shouldn't have blown off Vriska like that before. She's the one who's going to enter you into the game! You were too busy dreaming of Jade that you forgot. Damn teenage hormones.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3:**

**Vriska: Knit something amazing for your secret crush.**

Secret crush? Oh wouldn't everyone like to know. But the knitting part you can do, especially because everything you knit is amazing. Lately, you have been knitting scarves shaped like octopi, with eight appendages and all, which have been interesting to try on. You are pretty sure that your secret crush, whoever this person may be, would be slightly intimidated at the sight of an octoscarf.

Speaking of intimidated, Tavros is pestering you. Does he want to say sorry for his stupidity? Heh, probably.

- eternalTutelage [ET] began pestering tactileGlobetrotter [TG] –

ET: uHH,,, sORRY,,, i FORGOT THAT YOU WERE THE ONE WHO WAS SUPPOSED TO ENTER ME INTO sBURB  
TG: Oh, I was wondering when you were gonna remember!  
ET: yEAH,,, sORRY,,, i GOT DISTRACTED  
TG: Soooooooo, how is Jade?  
ET: wHAT  
TG: Just a friendly question! ::::)  
ET: uHHH,,,,  
ET: gOOD i GUESS  
TG: And when are you gonna ask her out?  
ET: uHHHHHHHH,,,,,,,,  
ET: pLEASE LET'S CHANGE THE SUBJECT  
TG: Awwwwwwww, why? Things aren't working out already?  
ET: cOME ON, vRISKA  
TG: Into the game?  
TG: Fiiiiiiiinally! I thought you forgot again!  
ET: uGH,,, yES PLEASE, lET'S GET ON WITH THIS  
ET: pUT ME IN THE GAME ALREADY  
TG: Woah! Hold your horses, man!  
TG: I gotta run the disk first!  
TG: Ok, I see you in your room.  
TG: Damn! Do you ever clean up?  
ET: uHH,,,, i JUST DIDN'T GET A CHANCE TO TODAY.  
TG: Oh sure, man.  
TG: Alright, let's get this shit started!


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4:**

**Aradia: Find Disc 1.**

Fuck your bro. Obviously he knew this game was of somewhat importance and took it from the mailbox to test you. You really fucking hate his tests sometimes.

You check your cell phone, which you had conveniently placed in your pocket prior to descending to the first floor, and find that Kanaya has pestered you.

**Aradia: Answer Kanaya.**

- guisingArtisan [GA] has begun pestering turntourAllkeeper [TA] -

GA: Can You Believe The Trolls  
GA: Who Do They Think They Are  
TA: what happened n0w  
GA: They Just Know How To Push Ones Nerves  
TA: did they say s0mething ab0ut y0ur 0utfit?  
GA: Yes How Did You Know  
TA: i kn0w y0u w0rk hard f0r fashi0n and when s0me0ne discredits y0ur awes0me shit with0ut s0me reas0n y0u flip y0ur shit  
GA: I Flip My Shit  
GA: Really  
TA: well y0u d0  
TA: but y0ur shit isnt flipped like a fucking pancake  
TA: alm0st burnt 0n 0ne side  
TA: ready f0r the c00k t0 fucking f0cus and flip it int0 the upper regi0ns 0f the atm0sphere  
TA: and c00k the 0ther side to perfect this shit as a wh0le  
TA: making it taste 0ut 0f this w0rld  
GA: Am I Supposed To Understand What You Just Said  
TA: i guess it was a c0mpliment  
GA: Oh Okay Then Thanks  
TA: n0 pr0blem  
TA: s0 what did the tr0lls say  
GA: The Annoying Rose Troll Mentioned How She Had Previously Seen An Outfit Similar To Mine On A Lowblood  
TA: a what  
GA: Didnt You Know About The Blood Caste System The Trolls Live By  
TA: i d0 n0w  
GA: She Then Continued To Say That If I Ever Were A Troll In A Different Universe I Couldnt Possibly Be Caste Over Mustard Bloods  
TA: i take it tr0lls have s0mething against mustard  
GA: Ugh I Just Dont See Why She Has To Try To Degrade My Self Esteem  
TA: theyre called fucking tr0lls f0r a reas0n  
TA: y0u sh0uldnt take their tr0lling t0 heart  
TA: just shed 0ff their hate  
TA: like y0u just came in fr0m a rainst0rm and y0ure taking 0ff y0ure s0aking rainc0at  
TA: but y0ure still dry because y0u shed the rain  
TA: with y0ur rainc0at  
GA: I Have To Go  
GA: Thanks For All The Wonderful Advice  
TA: y0u sure d0 l0ve sarcasm  
GA: Of Course

- guisingArtisan [GA] ceased pestering turntourAllkeeper [TA] -

**Aradia: Take out the trash.**

If by 'the trash' you mean bro and by 'take out' you mean beat his fucking ass, then you will happily comply. You need to show him that he can't push you around anymore.

**Aradia: Ascend.**

You reach your floor and find your apartment eerily silent. Your bro could surprise you at any moment. You ready your sword and tip toe to your bro's bedroom.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5:**

**Kanaya: Check your own mailbox for Sburb.**

You're pretty sure you can't because you don't have a mailbox. Even if you did have one, no mailperson would come to your island just for one person's mail. If you were a diplomat, maybe they would, but you aren't a diplomat.

Even so, this game sounds a little stupid to you. You don't really know much about it, but you would rather spend your time sewing some fashionable clothes for your friends. Because, face it, they need some help in that department.

Vriska interrupts your fashionable thoughts by pestering you.

- tactileGlobetrotter [TG] began pestering guisingArtisan [GA] -

TG: Hello Kanayaaaaaaaa  
GA: Hello Vriskaaaaaaaa  
TG: ::::)  
TG: So how are you gonna get S8ur8?  
GA: Im Not Sure  
GA: I Wasnt Really Planning On Playing Anyway  
TG: What! 8ut you have to play!  
TG: We need you!  
GA: Why  
GA: Im Not Good At Games  
GA: Ill Probably Get Everyone Killed  
TG: Oh, don't say that!  
TG: No matter what, we need you to play.  
TG: I feel like you'll be the most important player in the game.  
GA: What  
GA: What Gives You That Idea  
TG: I don't know! I just have a feeling.  
GA: You And Your Feelings Again  
TG: They are gr8 sometimes! ::::)  
GA: Dont You Have To Do Something With Tavros First  
TG: Yep, I already ran my disk, and he's almost in the game now.  
TG: 8ut anyway! We definitely need you!  
TG: You don't have to worry until the end though because you'll be in last.  
TG: Tavros will be the one to get you in.  
TG: 8ut first you have to get Aradia in.  
TG: The order is: Tav, Me, Aradia, then you.  
GA: But I Dont Have The Discs  
TG: I think  
TG: Aradia will take care of that for you.  
GA: Oh You Have a Feeling Again  
TG: Yep!  
GA: Well Hopefully Youre Right And She Can Get The Discs To Me In Time  
TG: I hope so, t8.  
GA: I Guess I Better Go Talk To Her Then  
TG: Talk To You L8r!  
GA: Bye

- guisingArtisan [GA] ceased pestering tactileGlobetrotter [TG] -

**Kanaya: Contact Aradia about Sburb.**

You almost start to pester Aradia when another window pops up on your screen. You hope it's not Rose again.

- antlersBunkum [AB] began pestering guisingArtisan [GA] -

AB: hello?  
AB: who is this?  
GA: Who Are You  
GA: You Were The One Who Started Trolling Me  
AB: really?  
AB: oh you're right.  
AB: i must have pressed the 'troll dumbfuck' button...  
AB: sorry! my mistake!  
GA: Ugh I Dont Even Know Why I Respond To You Freaks Anymore  
GA: I Might As Well Just Ban All Of You  
AB: no! that would be a HUGE mistake on your part!  
GA: Oh Really  
AB: i'm here to help you humans out! I just wanted to get to know you all a little better by some customary trolling. }:)  
GA: Why Even Bother  
GA: Go Troll Someone Of Your Own Brain Capacity  
AB: hey! i'm the one doing the trolling here!  
AB: ok, umm...  
AB: nice shirt... you get it from your lusus' nook?  
AB: hahaha!  
GA: Umm What  
AB: i crack myself UP! }xD  
GA: Awesome Trolling  
AB: no need to spell it out... i already knew.  
GA: It Was Great Considering Humans Do Not And Will Never Have Lusi  
AB: uhhh what?  
AB: what the hell do humans have then?  
GA: Parents  
GA: A Mother And Father  
GA: However Some People Only Have One Of These  
AB: woah why do you look so sad?  
AB: my trolling didn't hurt your feelings that much did it?  
GA: Im Not Sad You Obtuse Alien  
AB: obtuse?  
AB: that word sounds amazing... how can it ever be an insult?  
GA: Ugh Whatever  
GA: Please Stop Wasting My Time I Was About To Pester Someone Else Before You Popped Up On My Screen  
GA: Now Block Yourself Before I Reach Through My Computer Screen And Strangle You With My Keyboard Cord  
AB: WOAH ok i know when im not needed...  
AB: ill just slip out before you start growing fangs and bite my neck.  
GA: I Dont Even Want To Ask  
AB: well you're super pale! Basically as pale as a rainbow drinker...  
AB: ok then BYE!  
AB: i feel like we got to know each other very well today.  
GA: In Your Dreams  
AB: yes! i hope we meet there as well.  
GA: Ugh

- antlersBunkum [AB] ceased pestering guisingArtisan [GA] –

**Kanaya: Throw your computer out of the window.**

You would if you had a computer to dispose of. However, you only have your one precious computer, and it would not be worth throwing it just because of that annoying troll's banter. You take a breather and get on to pestering Aradia.


End file.
